January 14th - is....

What? You don't know how to talk like Jack...
Here are some samples:

Co-worker: How was your weekend?
You: damnit Bob, we don’t have time for simple questions.
Co-worker: I just asked about your weekend.
You: Dammit. Who are you working for?
Co-worker: Never mind, forget I asked.

Co-worker: Hey man. Did you already get breakfast?
You: I’ve killed 3 people today and no I’ve yet to eat breakfast. Dammit!
Co-worker: Is that a threat?
You: That’s not a threat, that’s a fact.

Boss: Hey, where are the reports I asked for?
(pull out stapler, move towards boss)
You: I think the question you should be asking is how are you going to read the reports after I staple your eyelids to your desk!

...and my personal favorite:
Co-worker: Hey, can you cover for me? I need to run an errand.
You: Let’s get one thing straight: the only reason you’re still conscious is that I don’t want to do your work for you.

Finally, remember that for the whole 24 hours of Talk Like Jack Bauer Day, you cannot go to the bathroom or charge a cell phone. Also, it should only take you a maximum of 3 minutes to get anywhere you are going!